Study Shows The Princess Is In Another Castle 87.5% Of The Time

That's some serious study

New Haven, Connecticut – Profoundly sidetracked Yale scholars have been working feverishly to determine the statistical accuracy of finding the hypothetically kidnapped Mushroom Kingdom Princess in a castle. It has been agreed that 87.5% of the time prospective rescuers will not happen upon the Princess, but instead be informed by a creepy fungus man that her whereabouts are elsewhere.
While probability and numerical accuracy have been officially cemented, researchers remain consistently baffled as to why she keeps getting yanked to begin with, or if she’s is even worth it at this point.

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Mickey – who has written posts on NintendoFuse.